The Rising Tide: Internet Cash May Not Be Enough To Save This Island Nation From Global Warming

Originally published in Sit’n'Spin Magazine, 2003.

One night some friends brought over their copy of the Tommy Lee – Pam Anderson sex video. We watched about forty-five minutes of the tape, which was mostly Tommy and Pamela flouncing around in their mansion like they were on Lifestyles of the Rich and Famous. After that, the happy couple went out cavorting in their motorboat, Tommy Lee chugging beers, steering wildly and pulling his erect penis from his swim trunks to honk the speedboat’s horn. Tragically, we never got to watch them hump, as the videotape had been recorded over with Wonder Years reruns before we got to the sexy part. Unsatisfied, I turned to the internet.